Now they’re back at school and we can finally shut the hotel for kids we’ve apparently been running all summer around here, maybe we can get on to answering some serious questions.
First: To let the kids bring their devices out to restaurants … or not?
We recently had dinner with ours at the pub. We do that often enough because we’re not stupid. We wouldn’t take them anywhere where there are tablecloths.
As it happens though, and as usually happens, we spent the better part of the night trying to amuse them with Chinese whisper games and promises to one day take them to Disneyland if they stayed on their seats, just so we could get through dinner before they started wandering/fighting/asking for money for the pinball machine/M&M dispenser/bar.
Then, just as I finished gulping down a pretty ordinary marinara, which I was at least partially grateful for because it didn’t originate from my own kitchen, I noticed them. In the corner. This nicely dressed family of four.
But here’s the thing – the adults were enjoying a glass of wine, which we were also doing but more in a manner that has been known to cause digestive type issues later in the night.
Unlike us, this couple were smiling at each other, making meaningful eye contact and chatting freely like they were alone, unencumbered, uninterrupted by hiccupping offspring who really, really want to go home now and can they have an ice-cream on the way.
They were able to do this because both their kids were head down, thumbs up on their electronic devices. It was as if they weren’t even there.
Who wins this one? The kids or the parents? The kids get to eat chips and create avatars and kingdoms while the parents get to finish a parmigiana and a sentence – so both, maybe.
A more peaceful dining tableau I have not seen around these here parts, because we generally don’t encourage the use of devices in public places, or forget to bring them, I’m not sure which is more the thing.
Yet at that moment, while negotiating to quickly leave the table to go to the loo and be back in time before the younger one did a runner for the television in the front bar, it did occur to me this other family had it all sorted.
And yet, I would also like to think my kids might one day grow up recognising what the actual real world looks like, and be able to sit at a table and hold a knife and fork while also speaking.
Sometimes I feel like I’m fighting a losing battle with the younger one at least, who eats dinner like she’s in a marathon race towards the sweet treat at the end and really does prefer to use her hands as cutlery and my clothes as a napkin.
But I keep trying, because sitting at the table and speaking was a fundamental part of my upbringing. It may well be boring when you’re eight, but it’s excellent fun when you’re a grown-up.
And I recently noticed a 20-something at a café who was using her knife like a fork and vice versa. I realised you can do all sorts of things in life to hide a lack of social training, but if you can’t manage cutlery the right way you’re a goner.
