TO: The Department of Transport
Ticket Infringements
Request for review of ticket infringement notice
Notice #31042**
Dear Sir/Madam,
I am writing to request a review of the above ticket infringement, received by me on the No. 57 tram at 6.39pm on February 14, 2014.
It was Valentine’s Day, and my husband and I were going out for dinner. I’m not sure, dear department, if the true impact of that will be clear to you, so let me just say again: it was a Friday night, it was Valentine’s Day, and we were going out. I know: it’s like saying we were about to take a rocket to Saturn!
Of course, there was all the work to be done before that luxurious evening alone: the babysitter to be organised; the house to be tidied for the babysitter; dinner prepared for the toddler and the babysitter. But we soldiered on, in the hope that once we got out the door and tossed back a rare cocktail, the old energy would return. I’m normally in bed by 8 every night, so I can’t tell you how exciting this was! (Sorry, I digress.)
In an attempt at responsible drinking and driving, we took the tram. So there we were in our date-night finery on the 57 tram – a piece of machinery renowned as one of the grubbiest, smelliest, least-well-maintained trams in the fleet. Do you deliberately not clean the exterior of the 57 in order to discourage further trashing of the vehicle? Are you trying to say something about the demographic of that service? On boarding, my dilemma was exquisite! Do I perch my beautiful silk skirt on that grim, grimy seat or just hang by the greasy strap above? But soon, that choice became irrelevant, for upon swiping my myki at the nearest machine, I heard the ominous beep: not valid.
Now, you need to know something about me, dear Department of Transport. I don’t think there has been a week of my adult life where I have not taken public transport somewhere in this city at least once, if not 10 times. And I pay. Every. Single. Time. Sometimes, I feel too lazy to haul my shopping bags from the market up the hill to home, so I hop on the tram for a mere two stops. And I pay. The ridiculous little clutch bag I had with me that night held only a lipstick, a credit card, and a myki – one I was sure had been linked to an automatic top-up.
But something had gone wrong, and the card didn’t work. Now, as you know, you can’t pay on board any more, so I sat there frozen. Get off, find an ATM, draw down cash on my credit card (at 18.5 per cent) and then wait for the next tram? I had no idea what the PIN was on that card, so there went that idea. Hail a cab and sit in Friday night peak hour traffic? Or take the chance? I saw him before he saw me.
Your officer was very nice about it. Nobody pinned my arms behind me. (I tried to make a bit of a joke about how I appreciated the lack of physical abuse. They didn’t find it funny. My husband was guffawing and pretending he didn’t know me. I didn’t find that funny, either.)
Anyway, they gave me the notice, told me the fine was about two hundred bucks and told me about my options for challenging the fine, which is why I am writing this letter. I’ve looked through the grounds: 1) mistaken identity; 2) medical circumstances; 3) exceptional circumstances, and I’ve decided to go with 3. The circumstances are:
In all the many years I’ve lived in Melbourne it is exceptional that I should ever be without a valid ticket on a tram. As a life-long financial supporter of public transport I ask that lenience be applied as it was Valentine’s Day, I was wearing a really nice frock, I’m home all day with a busy toddler and all I wanted was a night out with my husband.
I don’t want to threaten you, but I’m pretty sure a judge would look damn favourably on this argument, so I am prepared to have this matter heard by a court. And to ensure you don’t get me again, I’m going to walk there.
I await your decision,
Sincerely,
Virginia Trioli
Follow Virginia on Twitter @LaTrioli
